Hello! I just dropped in to tell you about the alternative bucket list I’ve started. It’s not exhaustive and is very much a work in progress.
Must dash – I’ve just necked a Sleepeaze and feel it working its magic already.
My bucket/ fucket list.
- Roll naked on wet grass, while laughing like a drain.
- Go a day without rolling my eyes or saying FOR FUCKSAKE.
- Eat a deep fried macaroni pie in batter. Maybe two.
- Throw a chair at a big window.
- Motorboat Dolly Parton.
- Get an ASBO
- Cut a ponytail off without the owner’s consent.
- Sweep a shelf of overpriced tatt in a posh shop on to the floor while shouting “YER STUFF’S SHITE” at the top of my voice.
- Pour a drink over somebody’s head.
- Not end up in prison for any of the above.
- Set off a fire extinguisher to see what the stuff looks like.
- Pull the emergency cord on a train. (Is that even still a thing?)
- Have a tiger anaesthetised so I can cuddle the shit out of it.
What’s on your bucket/fucket list?