What is it with this ridiculousness?

  What thought process, on rifling through the detritus of the floordrobe, results in the decision to wear such an abomination?

“The weather’s a bit inbetweeny today – I think I’ll don the Gladiator sandaloots”

(for surely this must be the word for footwear that combines the leg coverage of a boot with the skeleton structure of a sandal).

My lip also curled at the boak inducing monthly showerplug unblocking procedure. Nothing gives me the dry boak more than finding myself ankle deep in standing water thirty seconds in to a shower.  I HATE THAT. Is that all MY HAIR snarled up in the plug hole or is it the hair of a thousand strangers rising up from the depths of the bowels of hell via a fatberg? Yes I’m guilty of slovenly housewifery but judge not, lest ye be judged. My fingers may have explored a few questionable orifices in their time (yes I’m getting that in there before anybody else does – and that’s not a euphemism) but there ain’t no way they’re exploring hair down a plug hole, daily.

On a positive note, here are my three things for which I’m grateful today:

  1. My replacement Fitbit arrived. Mason is back in the game! My stats are down to zero, which worried my pal Kate so much she asked if I’d finally forsaken my perfectly serviceable but less than aesthetically pleasing legs and taken to a mobility scooter.
  2. These flowers from Mrs T’baps. Awwww. That’s the second week running she’s brought me flowers. What’s she done?  She must’ve done something…
  3. Dancing round the kitchen with Mrs T’baps to Friday night Solar Radio, including this top tune from yesteryear – from the days when I could rock a leotard, footless tights and a circle skirt split to the waist up Coils bar in Dumfries of a weekend (with the exception of that ill-advised one shoulder neon pink leotard which precluded the wearing of a bra and gave me the look of an extra in Debbie Does Dallas or equiv 70s soft porn movie.

Ps I haven’t checked that YouTube link because Mrs T is snoring gently beside me. If it turns out to be Pinky and Perky oinking their way through a medley of Beatles hits I do apologise – it should be Narada Michael Walden I Shoulda Loved Ya. 

Peace and love to you all.

PPS – oh for fucksake. It’s been brought to my attention that there’s no like button on the blog since my last plitter. If you want to express your like for this post hit me up on the Twitter or the Facebook. I crave your approval.

PPPS – now fixed. Thank you Sharon Halliday. Sharon’s brilliant company Infinite Eye will cater for all your web design needs x


  1. Lady Hotgash 26/09/2015 6:44 AM

    Baps! It’s the uniform for the new hospital; how did you miss that? It was in the Courier and everything…

    I’m looking forward to nipping to A&E with my next bout of Munchousen’s by Proxy and being treated with disdain (because apparently there are *really* sick people waiting to see a tired doctor) by some similarly clad reception staff.

    If it goes well they’re even going to trail it in B&M and Big Tesco’s! It’ll make the transition from work to after work drinks so much easier; no rushing to get washed and changed. Just a hose round the back to get the worst off.

    May your plug hole always be hair free. X

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